REVIEW: Vendetta (2013)

Runtime: 106 Mins
Rated: R

There was always the theory that you couldn’t go wrong with a violent revenge thriller.  This idea has now been proven wrong by Danny Dyer and his horrible revenge-em-up movie Vendetta (2013)  The intentions are good – shocking violence inflicted upon an inventory of lowlife pissants.  But that’s where the ‘good’ ends, apart from a few stylish shots of London’s cityscape.  The movie is a 1 hour and 46 minute drag of incomprehensibly shit writing, logic, casting, editing and acting.  Gotta put the ‘avoid’ sign up on this one.

So after his parents are burned alive in their own house by some disgusting chavs, SAS hard man Danny Dyer returns from Afghanistan to mete out justice, Old Testament style.  Forget an eye for an eye, it’s four limbs and a fucking ear, for an eye.  This formula is tried and tested, Charles Bronson made a career out of this type of thing.  It works as long as you keep in simple and brutally straight forward.  Trouble is this movie is afraid of not being accepted, so it makes a hackneyed attempt at becoming thickly-layered drama.  Oh man, what an own goal.  In slowing down it only shows its own limitations, of which there are many.

This movie varies from laughably awful to just plain awful, with the only relief in boredom coming from the former, when Dyer executes his next chav.  While those are moderately entertaining, they’re few and far between.  The movie rips off Dead Man’s Shoes (2004), The Hitcher (1986) and even First Blood (1982), when a shadowy Colonel is called in to talk down Dyer in his bruv-slaying.  Mind you, not to tell him to stop, just to stop making such a racket.  Is this normal practice for the army?  Speaking of ‘bruv’ this movie also sets a record for use of that word.  Hilariously so.  Scenes where the movie chases The Silence of the Lambs are created with point-and-laugh acting consisting of nothing more than the word ‘bruv’ being used for questions, suggestions, threats and pleading.

Do yourself a favor and watch Dead Mans Shoes instead, avoid this garbage.  It’s like, awful, bruv.

Rating: 4/10