Master Seagal Says He’s Going To Defuse U.S./Russia Tensions

If you’re worried about tensions between the U.S. and Russia over shit going down in the Ukraine and Crimean peninsula, don’t worry.

Steven Seagal has got this.

Seagal says he’s a good buddy of Vladimir Putin.  He even advised him on getting Russian kids fit.  So apparently he’s going to use this connection, possibly along with his connections in the CIA, to build bridges.  “It’s no secret that I have Republican views and policies of President Obama does not appeal to me. In many ways it is not even his fault, but the people who are in his inner circle who have views on world politics are diametrically opposed to Russia. In my opinion, a situation where the U.S. and Russia are on opposite sides of the fence is abnormal. And I see my task is to do everything to facilitate the normalization of relations. All will benefit from this.”

Well there you have it.  I for one will sleep soundly tonight for the first time in many weeks.  We should deploy Seagal to seek his wise council in serious matters like this.  Thanks, Steve.