Mainstream Critics Destroy Batman Vs Superman

Obviously, comic book movies are not covered here.  However an exception is going to made today, the flagship of leotard hegemony has taken some critical torpedo hits.  As Leo Getz once said, Astern! Avast you landlubbers! Man the bilge pumps!

The movie is sitting at 36% on RottenTomatoes and 47% on Metacritic.  Here are some of the reviews.

“As a pure visual spectacle, however, Batman v Superman ably blows the hinges off the multiplex doors, and editor David Brenner does excellent work to comprehensibly streamline the chaos, capably captured by d.p. Larry Fong….” Andrew Barker, Variety

“The villain here, Jesse Eisenberg’s Lex Luthor, is so intensely annoying that, very early on, you wish Batman and Superman would just patch up their differences and join forces to put the squirrelly rascal out of his, and our, misery…” Todd McCarthy, Hollywood Reporter

“Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice is not a good movie. It offers a truly unengaging Batman and then allows that character to dominate the proceedings while providing a painfully mopey and grim Superman-and-Friends narrative where the only ray of light comes from its homicidal arch-villain. The action scenes get better as they go along, but they aren’t as clean as comprehensible as Man of Steel’s daylight smack downs…” Scott Mendelson, Forbes

“Dawn of Justice is big, all right. The brawls are busy and brutal, the story is sprawling in scope, the effects are an embarrassment of pixels, and the performances (well, some of them, at least) couldn’t be broader. If it’s just size you’re after, you won’t be disappointed. But at this point in Hollywood’s superhero cycle, is that really enough…” Chris Nashawaty, EW

“Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice defies the odds and delivers a terrific entree to the DC Movie Universe and the emergence of the Justice League. While it’s still a case of searching for Superman, a fully realised Batman and Wonder Woman are there to hold Clark’s hand…” Blake Howard, Graffiti with Punctuation

“Treatment of Wonder Woman’s character is symptomatic of Batman v Superman’s most galling problem: Snyder’s propensity to under-develop key ideas and characters while working in a space that could barely afford him more time (the movie clocks in at over two-and-a-half hours)…” Luke Buckmaster, The Daily Review

“While Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice has good things to recommend it, its shortcomings are undeniable. The action sequences whenever Batman is set loose on the bad guys are cool, and the story strives to explore human and philosophical elements, but it’s often not much fun…” Jim Vejvoda, IGN

Normally, mainstream critics are adept at polishing turds.  So when they attack a movie like this, it must be bad. Predictably, the fantards and cultists are already crying foul, even though they haven’t seen it.  I mean what does this tell you about the mindset of people like that?  Stop ruining my hype for the super hero movie, dude, you suck? Really?  These are adults? And relied upon to vote in elections?

I hope Spielberg’s prediction that the whole thing is going to pop comes true.  And John McTiernan was right too, the days of good superhero movies are gone.  Enough with these fucking movies!  All of them!