‘YOU THE ICE CREAM MAN’?

While pushing out forty VOD movies a year, Bruce Willis managed to give us possibly the manliest movie scene of 2018.  Kersey takes out The Ice Cream Man.

Reviewed here by Mucho Macho, we gave this movie the thumbs up.  Everyone likes it.  Even though critics tore it to shreds on the basis of not aligning itself to their personal extremist beliefs.

Here are some selections from the rage that was brewing;

“An old man’s movie, made for even older men — impotent, angry ones.”

“There’s something distinctly odious about a storyteller exploiting both a city’s tragic reality and a country’s debate about firearms to make a film that thrives on violence.”

“Death Wish is an NRA member’s wet dream, a perfect film for the America that only exists in the poisoned imagination of the pathetic would-be bully in the White House.”

“Now is such a terrible time to release a movie about a white vigilante “taking out the trash” that I expected it to justify its existence somehow. It never did. If anything it’s *less* satirical than the original.”

Is this a movie, or a documentary?  And are the above four writers movie critics, or aspiring politicians?  Here was more…

“This is a wish-fulfillment fantasy the NRA will celebrate – and that’s what’s truly disturbing.”

“It’s very obvious that Roth doesn’t really care about the film’s political baggage – he just wants an excuse to have Bruce Willis shoot battery acid into a guy’s sciatic nerve and watch the blood.”

“It’s the absolute wrong movie at the absolute wrong time.”

“To criticize Death Wish for its indelicate timing would be to suggest that there might ever be an appropriate moment to see it.”

“At a time when Americans are constantly bombarded with reports of unpunished police brutality, the film suggests that the true problem with justice in our country is that law enforcement isn’t violent enough.”

“Guns, for all their destruction, are a wussy, arm’s-length way to exact vengeance, and Dr. Kersey seems like a video game avatar. Roth, whose films earned the “torture porn” label, could have plunged much deeper into the theme of a blood debt.”

Unfortunately, as Duke Nukem was taken to the gallows by woke soylent-grin neckbeards, so was Death Wish, perhaps Walter_B’s only chance to regain some dignity.  There is almost certainly not going to be a sequel.